My Stupid Mouth

It appears, at least from my humble and lay perspective, that one of the more fundamental characteristics common to successful or memorable movies or tv shows is the ability to strike at the heart of themes to which people personally relate. I'm sure most of you out there have been guilty of saying, "that's me!" when watching a movie with a persona that seems to illustrate your "issues" in life, albeit most of the time, the dark and humorous ones. The extent of this relation-to-movie phenomemon can be absurd too. For example, I was having dinner with a friend from law school here in New York when we noticed 4 women at the bar: a red head, brunette, and two blondes sipping on martinis, scoping out men, and yes...talking about sex.

I guess in a sense Hollywood has the power to sustain social themes and thus draw the viewer closer and more personally to the film. In a certain sense, songs have the same power...at least the well-written ones.

The other evening, I was reminded of my college days - driving fast cars, uncontrollable hormones, junk-food binging and being a member of a rock band. During the lighter and latter years, I remember performing a John Mayer song that resonated in me because of the lyrics and the tune. I thought that the song was me or at least a projection of how I wanted to be.

Check it out:

My stupid mouth
Has got me in trouble
I said too much again
To a date over dinner yesterday
And I could see
She was offended
She said "well anyway..."
Just dying for a subject change


Oh, it's another social casualty
Score one more for me
How could I forget?
Mama said "think before speaking"
No filter in my head
Oh, what's a boy to do
I guess he better find one soon


We bit our lips
She looked out the window
Rolling tiny balls of napkin paper
I played a quick game of chess with the salt and pepper shaker
And I could see clearly, An indelible line was drawn
Between what was good, what JUST slipped out and what went wrong


Oh, the way she feels about me has changed
Thanks for playing, try again.
How could I forget?
Mama said "think before speaking"
No filter in my head
Oh, what's a boy to do
I guess he better find one


I'm never speaking up again
It only hurts me
I'd rather be a mystery
Than she desert me


Oh I'm never speaking up again
Starting now


One more thing
Why is it my fault?
So maybe I try too hard
But it's all because of this desire
I just wanna be liked
I just wanna be funny
Looks like the jokes on me
So call me captain backfire

I'm never speaking up again
it only hurts me
I'd rather be a mystery
than she desert me

oh i'm never speaking up again
Starting now, starting now...

There's a cute irony to the song. The irony is, in some respects, the guy in the song is a complete and utter loser. In real life, he needs to shape the way he communicates with women because because saying too much can get you into deep holes. Of course, he attempts to try harder the next time and ends up overcompensating by saying too little, and then he becomes a boring conversationalist and a bad date. The irony however, lies in a distinction I made above. This "loser" is the ultimate winner in movieland. This is John Cusack. The guy who fumbles and screws up and can't articulate his feelings and gets restless during a dinner date. The girl character, of course, ends up falling for him...and then going back to real life, chick-flick fanatics end up falling for him too.

I can't really tell if my perspective on my relation to this song is one from the movieland concept or the real life one. Hell, I can't even tell if this is who I am or who I want to be, or who I don't want to be. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore. Maybe I just like the song and I'm a fan of the underdog.

"One more thing
Why is it my fault?
So maybe I try too hard
But it's all because of this desire
I just wanna be liked
I just wanna be funny
Looks like the jokes on me
So call me captain backfire"

I love it. It's almost like a self-deprecating joke turned hit song.

TRIVIA: It's bizaare, as I was told the other night, how things come around full circle - This song reminded me of funny social themes in life - dating, self-consciousness and self-confidence - which then reminded me of hollywood characters - John Cusack in any chick-flick. I then remembered watching Serendipity starring John Cusack. The Serendipity soundtrack contains my favorite John Mayer song, "1983."